You just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things. Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am. Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you. Just wait, that's all. Don't be anxious, don't worry, don't look around at things others have gotten or that I have given them. Don't look around at the things you think you want, just keep looking off and away up to Me, or you'll miss what I want to show you. And then, when you're ready, I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than you could dream of. -Be Satisfied with Me, St. Anthony of Padua
While watching so many young women (friends of mine) get closer and closer to their vocation, I felt like God had forgotten about me. At the age of 23, it seemed like my life had become a bit repetitive. Living in Queens, NY while working in Hoboken, NJ, I was consumed by my job, I barely had time for a social life and if I did it was among the same circles I was always a part of. Prior to starting this new job, there was a shift in my participation within ministry, I was no longer a part of large movements; the Lord was bringing me to places where I served the poor individually and in smaller spaces. This change was extremely important, looking back, this was how He was preparing my heart to meet my spouse. All in all, this repetitive cycle would help prepare me to be a mother and a wife, finding Christ in the little things.
The thought of online dating crossed my mind but I was fearful of experiencing disappointment like I did prior to having used a secular site. This time around my faith was much stronger and full of conviction, I knew for a fact that I was not going to compromise my faith. It was non-negotiable that he had to be Catholic, not just by word of mouth but his life needed to reflect Christ. My mother greatly encouraged me to attempt online dating, seeing that I wasn’t meeting new people and my job almost consumed my life. This time I attempted to use only Catholic based dating sites, not Christian but Catholic. God was asking me to be extremely specific with what I wanted, and so I was. Please know that this isn’t to take away from the experiences of many couples having met on other dating sites, but in my heart I knew it wasn’t enough for me. I wanted specifically what God had planned and this was the direction the Holy Spirit was taking me.
I chose to use a site called Catholic Singles.Com. What most appealed to me was the specificity of faith filled content that I was required to answer. There were questions asking about the beliefs of the Church, my favorite devotions, how many times do I pray, my relationship with Christ and what exactly did my faith mean to me. It also provided areas for me to describe my idea of a perfect date and what I look for in a significant other. Catholic Singles also provides you with an online community, filled with webinars and reflections on Catholic teaching, Theology of the Body and the word of God. Many of us can agree that waiting can be the most difficult part, to have a community of “waiters” can be really encouraging.
Dating, in general, is risky. You put your heart on the line and it may or may not work out, it isn’t always a guarantee. The difference, I find, in dating (in person) and online is how much more forward and direct you must be. Let me explain. Through online dating, I am specifically searching for a significant other, not friends. I am providing a lot of information about myself in hopes that someone can relate and reciprocate those desires, all in one place. When my husband and I began speaking through the site and later through other mediums, our conversations were very deep from the beginning. He was an older gentleman from a completely different country, I mean, I was concerned for my safety. It was a priority that I made my intentions clear and I could ensure that he was being truthful. Unfortunately, there are people out there with not so great intentions who can cause a large amount of damage, it is incredibly important to be safe. There was never a moment where I wasn’t asking the Holy Spirit for guidance, Christ needed to be a part of our conversations. When meeting in person for the first time, we were never alone: we had private moments but that was later. The first-time Jason, my husband, came to meet me he also met all my very close friends. It was imperative that they also knew him because I trust their judgement greatly, they are my family. Still to this very day those same exact people have partaken in the milestones of our relationship.
The first paragraph in the blog is an excerpt from the passage “Be satisfied with me” by Saint Anthony of Padua. I would read and pray with that passage every day the year hubby and I met. Ladies, I am horrible at waiting on God it is truly one of my biggest struggles. This passage spoke to my heart on so many levels, turns out that my husband was also praying to Saint Anthony. A week prior to speaking online, he prayed a chaplet to him asking for help in finding his wife. Fast forward to 3 years later, we are happily married with a beautiful baby boy. Online dating was a blessing for us and for many but it isn’t for everyone. It requires patience, boldness, courage and trust. Question everything but trust in the Lord. 1 Thessalonians 5:20-22 "Do not despise the words of prophets, but test everything; hold fast to what is good; abstain from every form of evil." I never thought my love story would be a virtual one but it taught me a great deal about grace, sacrifice and how strong love can truly be knowing that it has absolutely no boundaries. God is truly good, and our Lady loves to spoil us.
Angelica Vargas is a full-time mommy. She is a Colombian who has lived in NYC for most of her life until now, where she is currently residing in Canada with her loving Husband Jason. She is passionate and actively engaged in her faith and the world around her.